Sunday, April 19, 2009

What's Goin' On

photo by Pagan Sphinx
Flowers in Emily Dickinson's Garden Amherst, Massachusetts

Wow! I can't believe it's been an entire week since I've been to either of my blogs. I believe that's the longest stretch of time I've gone without posting something, except when I've been on vacation.

It was no picnic, though. I ran around a lot for Alice's service on Saturday, the 11th and I haven't stopped running since. There was stuff to do: calls and visits to make, thank yous to pass on, emails to return. I managed to get some yard work done but that's about it. The house, especially my room and workspace, are a total freaking mess. The good news is that next week is spring vacation week and I can try to get some things done without entirely sacrificing my mad time; time to just do what I want to do, have fun and enjoy the weather.

I want to thank all who sent good wishes and prayers and thoughts and love our way when Alice died. Your kindness is very much appreciated, as this has been a highly reflective time for me. Alice is the first very old person with whom I became friends. Every other loss has been an elderly relative: grandparents, aunts and uncles. It affected me more than I was prepared for. You start feeling the loss more as the days go on, especially when you're accustomed to seeing and talking to that person on a regular basis.

Ed: thank you for the Tongue and Groove CD! It was a very cool surprise to get that in the mail! I've yet to play it but "yet to" has my mantra lately. One of the reasons I'm looking forward to vacation is so I can listen to your bass! ;-) Best to Suzy and thank you both for keeping our family in your thoughts.

Bobbie, Dianne, JCF, Betmo, Cunning Runt, Susan, Linda, Steve, Lisa, Fran, Sherry, Thorne, Kenju and Daryl - you are all dear to me. Really. Oh, and Grandmere Mimi and Soulbrush, too. I hope I haven't forgotten anyone who so generously has remembered my family and me. Hugs and love to you all.

Bluebear2 - It's been much too long since we exchanged blog visits! I'm glad to see you are around and thus your blogs. I'll go over to see what you've been up to very soon. Your story is quite sad. We're hoping to keep Alice's house in the family and maybe even see grandchildren grow up there. But in the way future, who knows.

Aleksandra: welcome and thank you for the Easter greetings. I would love to check out your blog soon.

Utah Savage: Why, thank you for the award! I'm on my way there right now to pick it up. I kind of like that feeling of anticipation, don't you? We lead such exciting lives. Always busy picking up awards that define how wonderful we are! ;-) I'm glad this blog planet exists as a break from the ordinariness of daily life!

Enjoy your week and I hope to be a part of comments on all of your blogs!

As they say in Portugal "beijinhos" (little kisses)


  1. I'm glad to see you're back up and running as I was just a teensy bit worried. You've been busy with the practicalities but also with the long good-bye. It's a blessing for Alice on her journey home that you remember her in your heart and send good wishes her way.

    Take good care of yourself too and enjoy the lovely spring.

  2. hugs to you :) here's hopin' you have a great vacation this week- you deserve it. it's funny how folks seem to wrap themselves around your heart and you don't usually realize how strong it is until something happens. i completely understand. namaste.

  3. spring break is coming at a perfect time for you! really truly make sure you do lots of stuff just for you

    it's good to see ya back, I missed you crazy bad ;)

  4. Susan, Betmo and Dianne: I missed you too. So much! I wish I had more time. And yet I'm facing having even less when I'm enrolled in that graduate program. You know, the one I don't really want to do but must for my future?? That bright and shining future of getting old and retiring and dealing with all kinds of stupid crap?? ;-)

    Aaah. Doncha love my optimism these days?

  5. Pagan - It is amazing how much time it takes to handle all those "little" (and not so little) things when someone leaves.

    And your remark about Alice being your first quite elderly friend to pass over - not a relative - and how hard it hit you, hit me. When I was in my early twenties, recently married and in college (second time), I was volunteering at a nursing home near our little rented house, teaching painting classes (THAT was an experience!) and spending some time with a few of the residents who did not get guests. I befriended a tough old fellow, an attempted suicide after the loss of his wife (head still marked with the scar from where the bullet exited...) who cut me no slack whatsoever as a "do-gooder". He was from Valencia, one of the proudest men I've ever known. He was hard to visit. Eventually I loved him, and he began to open up to me and to look forward to my visits. It was hard to lose him. Your post brought it all back. It's weird how my past seems to require archeology... Thanks for being you, and sharing it with all of us.

  6. Gina, welcome back. I would have worried about your absence, but I had a fair idea what you must have been going through.

    And "Beijinhos" to both you and W!

  7. Thank you all, dear friends. You are a comfort to me in the best and worse of times.

    Steve: if it takes archeology, that's ok. It's worth the work to find those artifacts. One of the reasons I love blogging and love you!

    CR: I'm so glad you're in my life. I loves me my friend and co-parent!

  8. Gina, I'm sorry I'm so late w/ a "Back Atcha"!

    Whatever your belief-system, Death (and dealing w/ it) Sucks. :-/ Hang in there---love to WP.


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